Etiquette talking to a breeder

Greetings, I am normally very shy and am afraid of coming off too strong. I have contacted a breeder about the snake that I want, but they haven’t hatched yet. He told me they were close, but not quite ready. When is it acceptable to ask to have my name put to one of the snakes, to make sure I get one.

I have been told by other people in the community that he is a great breeder with quality animals and I’ve asked about food, but are there other questions that I should be asking? Should I ask them now or wait? I’m sorry if these are silly questions, but I’m very new to this and again, don’t want to come off too strong.

It’s tough to buy something sight unseen, but if he can back it up and it’s something you want then reserve it before others do. Ultimately you have to trust , also it not being born yet things can go south. I have a MBK on hold who is still in the egg. The breeder has 3/4 of the clutches spoken for already. So I reserved mine.

1 Like

Regarding holding a snake for you, everyone is different, but it’s unlikely that a breeder will officially hold something for you without money down. And most breeders won’t take money on a snake that might not exist for sale. So I think you should expect that you won’t be able to reserve a snake until it is at least hatched and eating. That’s just my opinion to help set your expectations, I don’t think it hurts to ask the specific breeder for your options though.

2 Likes

Hey, don’t feel bad! I’m pretty shy too and communicating is sometimes awkward for me.
The best you can do is ask the breeder if they can let you know right away if the snake you are looking for happens to hatch out.
If it does, then that would be your opportunity to offer to put some sort of deposit on it until it is ready to be sent out to you.

Well now I’m running into the problem that he isn’t responding to any of my messages. It’s like I have been muted, which really sucks as I was hoping to get one of his snakes. I have been looking for an Axanthic Bull Snake and he told me they would be hatching in the next week or so. I asked if I could DM he said sure (this was on facebook) I asked him if he does frozen/thawed or live food for his snakes. He answered and that was the last i heard from him for like a week or two now.

It happens,. They’re busy, someone bought it, they don’t like you, they’re a flake, life happens sometimes too. Etc. Move on that snake wasn’t ment to be. I just recently posted/vented about a similar situation. Within 24hrs it was mine then wasn’t. It sucks. But maybe he wasn’t someone you wanted to start dealing with. Relationships go a long way, no one “needs” to sell you anything. Someone else will buy it.

1 Like

Thanks for that advice. I was just super hopeful. I guess it’s just time I move on.

If you’re very interested in the snake in question keep pushing. Don’t be rude but let the breeder know you’re still interested. I’ve contacted some breeders in the past and haven’t heard back from them for over a month. Then out of the blue I hear back and the deal was made. Breeders have a lot on their plate, and if the breeder is reputable he could be very busy.
Don’t feel bad about being shy, we all can be shy at times and you sound to be passionate which really is the most important thing in his hobby.
Keep you head up and it will work out one way or another, axanthic bulls are rare but there will be more available someday somewhere. And if you wait for a long time to get one, it will only be more rewarding when you do, and one day you will.
Never be sorry for asking questions, no question is ever without warrant to ask.
Good luck :+1:

2 Likes

I really appreciate all the advice and things to think a out from this group. I am going to keep looking and if he contacts me, he contacts me if not then at least I’ve kept my options open.

We don’t sell or take deposits on anything till it exists. In the egg and hatching soon is great but anything can happen. We simply keep a list of interested parties and when we have them reach out.
As for not being contacted on Facebook have they read your message and just ignoring you? Or have they not even read the message?
If they are ignoring you move on. If they haven’t read the messages then just wait and continue to see if any others pop up.
Above all else it’s not rude to ask questions or want a reply. Just remember be polite.

2 Likes

I had a similar experience last year about a specific species for which finding a breeder that has exceptional example was not easy to find, the breeder came highly recommended by a friend so I contacted them and ask if they could let me know when they would produce what I was looking for.

I ask twice in a 3 months period, than they produce what I was looking for and I did not hear from them, I ask them if any would be made available and if so if they could let me know when they were ready, I was told yes and that they would let me know once they shed, I gave it another 2 weeks which was plenty enough time and never hear from them again to this day……I just moved on.

I know people get busy but the thing I cannot overlook is when someone say they are gonna do something several time and they do not do it, if I tell someone I will get back to them, I will, if I tell them, I will get back to them on a certain day, I will.

Poor communication prior to a sale is not a good sign for what happens next if there is a transaction and something goes wrong and if you do not intent on contacting people, do not string them along, be honest tell them you are busy and to check back with you in 2 weeks or 4 weeks.

3 Likes

I have a horrible memory, so when someone asks me to let them know when something will be available or if i produce a certain morph they are looking for i always reply with “i will try to remember but i have a terrible memory, so please check back with me if i don’t contact you”.

3 Likes

Good news, the breeder responded back, apologized that he didn’t answer sooner. He told me that he doesnt take names for a list and when they hatch he will be letting our group know and if I want one to let him know then. We can discuss all the options we want then.

2 Likes